Custody

Starting a custody case may not be the path that all parents who are living separately will take. Some people decide not to get a custody order because they don’t want to get the courts involved. They may have an informal agreement that wo­rks well for them or may think going to court will provoke the other parent, or there may be other reasons that a parent doesn’t want to involve the court system. Some of the benefits of a custody order are that the order can give you the right to make decisions about your child (legal custody) and the right to have your child live with you (physical custody).

Before filing in court for custody, you may want to consider drawing up an out-of-court agreement with the other parent. Usually parents will have to be flexible when it comes to custody and visitation for the benefit of the child. Often times, parents who fight for sole custody will litigate in court for months or even years and end up with some sort of joint custody agreement after settlement or trial. However, sometimes fighting for sole custody is necessary because you can’t agree with the other parent, the other parent is not allowing contact, or your fear for your child’s well-being. Especially with domestic violence, many abusers will try to keep power and control over the victim-survivor through the child, so joint custody isn’t recommended due to the power difference in the relationship.